Hi Bill,
Sorry to bother you.
I’m sitting here writing a letter to you because my wife doesn’t stop nagging – and between you and me – isn’t willing to go to bed before I thank you. You can only guess how hard it is to thank a man whose computer operating system constantly requires updates, and I must wait for them to be completed. Sometimes even the deadline for the translation text has been exceeded. After getting free from the fucking that haunted me in the early years, I started to draw pictures to make the waiting time go faster. When the Windows system was engaged in a contradictory internal dialogue, my old drawing skills from my youth returned. And in the long run, I have become an outstanding painter. Yes, during the 20 years you have time to get Windows better and I have to creativeness.
A year ago, encouraged by my wife, I held a visual art exhibition on Helsinki Boulevard in the famous photo gallery. The miracle that I got there. My show was a success, and my painting sold out at the incredible starting prices my wife charged them. She, a prominent, comforted me before the show: prices can always drop but hardly ever raise under the buyer’s beak. I agreed, considering myself a modern wise man who can guide his wife without her even realizes this. Who would buy my painting at astronomical sums? Wrong again.
What bothers me most, however, is that while we have been able to get our household on a more solid footing thanks to the income from painting sales, I have not received praise from my wife, but I have to thank you. She says that I couldn’t eat chewing gum and walk simultaneously before I got acquainted with Windows and adds that now I remember all the assignments and carry out the translation work in time even though I had heard it the night before.
This is how I will thank you and send the most valuable painting of my exhibition to you. Even before the show, my wife had decided to leave the picture with the highest offered price for you. Can you imagine hugs from my wife to you and painting from me?
With respect
Matti Ivarsson
Translator
PS My wife is shouting from the living room that dear greetings to you from her. Her name is Hulda, and she is already planning the next art show. And she adds:” Don’t use foul language or criticize the Windows operating system. You owe to Billie”.
© Yelling Rosa
22/4 –21
PS This story, ”Ode to Bill Gates … from My Wife”, is fiction.
Please enlarge this 15 meters long salmon by clicking on it. After the flood, it is totally out of the water. This fish is one of my home town’s stainless steel sculptures. Tornio Stainless Steel is known worldwide.
The salmon sculpture, named Kajamo, is designed by Pekka ja Teija Isorättyä. Visit their Home site in English.
Friend in Need
I have heard the urban, or should I say rural, legend about a Finnish farmer. He either his wife didn’t know how to make babies. When a doctor found this out, he explained the process to the young couple.
Next summer Dr. Virta went again to the farm, but no children were born. He asked displeased: “Haven’t I explained the procedure” but soon realized that he must show how it happens. So he gave the flashlight to a man because the bedroom was a bit dark and asked a man to light up the right place while he is doing the act so that the farmer can do it on his own.
After the lapse of five years, the doctor, who worked in the village only as a summer substitute while his permanent work was in the city, thought that he must see whether the young couple has offspring. When our doctor arrived at the destination, he saw young children running outside the house. A young man seemed to be very proud of his achievements. The doctor smiled and said to him that the first step is always the hardest.
Yes, admitted the farmer, but ever since I have known how to light up the right place, there haven’t been any problems, and our neighbor has been a friend in need.
The Finnish Rural Legend
in English dramatized,
translated and revised by
©Yelling Rosa
25/9 -14
Explanation:
Virta, a Finnish surname, can be translated as Stream. If you say in Finland that “jollakulla on virtaa”. It means that he/she has a lot of energy (drive).
PS You find all my stories in one place at: http://www.yellingrosa.com/stories01.html
A fabulous story, and thoroughly enjoyable, with plently giggles … 😂🤣
TykkääLiked by 2 people
Thank you for your comment. I am happy that you enjoyed the story 😉
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
What a story!!! ;.)
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment 😉
TykkääTykkää
What a great letter and story.
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your encouraging words 🙂
TykkääTykkää
Two most excellent stories! The photo is fabulous as well! 🙂 (Those MS updates are so annoying! 😀 )
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment. I am happy that you like my stories 🙂
Have a lovely Sunday
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Really funny stories !! You made my Sunday more beautiful! Thank you!!! 🙂
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your kind words 🙂
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Haha, wonderful, not only the letter, but also the rural story! My husband loved them too.
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thanks for the encouraging comment. I’m glad you were fascinated by my stories 🙂
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
very nice is this dedication to Bill Gates
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you! I am so glad to hear that.
Have a lovely week 🐻
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
smile
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Why you don’t send your letter to Bill Gates I am quite sure he will appreciate It 🤩
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment. Perhaps 😉
TykkääTykkää
Let me know😉
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
All right 😉
TykkääTykkää
Not all evil comes to harm!
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment.
Yes, you’re right 🙂
TykkääTykkää
It takes teamwork! And you are lucky to have her on your team.
TykkääTykkää
Thank you for your comment.
Yes, you’re right, and I am happy 😉
YR
TykkääTykkää
😊.
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Yep 😉
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Gates seems like one of the rare rich tech people who actually try to do good by the world. He’s still complicated because his business strategies were brutal, but at least he tries to give back. (Maybe it’s not as rare as I think, there are more rich people with charities/who give to charity)
TykkääLiked by 2 people
Thank you for your comment.
I agree with you 🙂
Take care
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
The fact that rich people organize themselves charitablely is ofteng overlooked, especially at the moment in Germany. On May 1, a bicycle demonstration took place in Berlin, Grunewald, the villa district. A protest sign read: Rich, give up villa!
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment.
Yes, you are right, so many opinions as there are heads 🙂
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
I don’t think the critique is that off. Sure most of their money usually doesn’t go to luxuries (more stocks and such) but poor people spend a larger portion of their money on charity than rich people even though a rich person losing 1% will not feel it in their lifestyle as much as a poor person. There are some good rich people, but on average they seem to have, at least, a skewed perception of their moral responsibility.
TykkääLiked by 2 people
Thank you for your comment 🙂
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Both very funny.:-) I love the salmon sculpture!
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you very much.
I am so glad to hear that you find my stories funny 🙂
The Sculpture is impressive. Now it’s totally out of the water, and it is at least 15 meters long if we believe my step measuring. I said earlier that it is 10 meters long. 15 Meters = 49.212598 Feet.
YR
TykkääTykkää
Wonder if that is why Melinda decided to leave…too many updates needed.
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment.
Who does know that 🐻 🙂 🐻
YR
TykkääTykkää
Funny in your letter to Bill Gates I found the place where it is about who leads whom in the marriage. This seems to be an issue in many marriages until the last breath.
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment.
In Finland we have the saying:
The man may be the head of the family, but the wife moves that head.
Have a sunny days there in Germany 🙂
YR
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
It’s funny, a saying that I can translate and apply into German. Thank you!
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
You are very Wellcome 🙂
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Loved the letter. Your wit is remarkable. A good Windows bashing.
I guess Bill will have to write to his own wife now since their separation.
Doubt she’ll be interested. 🙂
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö
Thank you for your comment.
I am glad to hear that you like the letter 🙂
I agree with you on Bill 😉
TykkääLiked by 1 henkilö